My alphabet of fantasies and kinky pleasures

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Since I discovered and embraced my true sexual self, I’ve been exploring my sexuality in a completely different way.

Before, I was a vanilla woman. My sex life was good. Yet, it was incomplete. There was an intensity I wanted to feel, but I wasn’t sure how I’d get it. I knew there were more sensations to explore.

The hunger that remained after sex (and often, during), wasn’t supposed to happen.

When I started dating Mr P., I finally discovered what I was missing all those years: I’m a kinkster. I’ve always been; I just didn’t know. That’s why I…


For a fulfilled sex life, you must know what you like. Here’s how you’ll learn it.

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Having good sex and having mind-blowing sex are two different things. One is average and mundane, the other is the all-mighty of sex. For all my adulthood I’ve only experienced the first version.

I had sex “regularly”, most of the times with pleasurable orgasms. Yet, I always felt there would be more about sex — I was sure I was missing something out.

It took me a long time (too long) to finally discover what I like sexually. It took me years to meet my true sexual self.

Now that I did — I’m sexually fulfilled as I never was…


My first time rimming someone was spectacular

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I’m a pleaser in bed: seeing my lover contorting in pleasure is one of the best stimuli I have, so I always aim to give him the type of pleasure he loves the most. Perhaps this is one of the reasons I never thought twice about giving Mr P. anilingus (commonly known as rimming.) Before him, I’ve never done it to anyone; he was the first man I ever did anal play with. I won’t waste my time in overthinking why I never explored this type of pleasure before. But really, why not!?

When we started having sex, I knew…


Partnered dry humping should be part of your foreplay game.

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A couple of years ago, I dated a guy who I met on a dating app. We talked daily for three weeks before our first date; our working and personal schedules didn't allow us to meet earlier.

I hadn’t been on the app for long, but I had several “conversations” and a few dates that made me rethink my decision of signing in for online dating. But with him it was different.

Besides having an awesome style and being gorgeous, this guy was funny and very sweet. We had a lot in common, so we got along very well.

The…


These non-sexual activities can be used as foreplay (making sex so much more pleasurable).

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I love sex. But for me, sex without foreplay is rare to happen.

Foreplay is “part one” of sex. It’s more than warming up the bodies for what’s coming. It’s an emotional connection, a bridge we build from the real (stressing) life to a relaxing, immune-to-anything moment.

There are thousands of ways you can engage in foreplay with your partner; using toys, your oral skills, your hands, your voice,… All of them work wonderfully to connect you to the moment.

But you also have foreplay activities that aren’t sexual and, like the above, have an amazing impact on your sex…


A guide on how to use a butt plug (and why it’s so pleasurable)

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There are many ways to add novelty and pleasure to your sex life. Sex toys are for me the best way to do it. Amongst my favourites, it’s the butt plug.

As the name indicates, it’s a sex toy you insert in your butt. And we all have one of those, so this sex toy is not specific for penis or vulva owners. Anyone can enjoy the pleasures of using a butt plug.

The anus is an extremely sensitive area; it has thousands of nerve endings around the opening and the anal walls. …


Take it from someone fiercely independent (who’s in love with someone like her.)

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I love to be single. But I also loved it when I was married.

Since I became single again, almost seven years ago, several times I missed sharing my life with someone.

I missed having someone waiting for me at home; I missed knowing that no matter how bad my day was, it always ended with my body (and soul) wrapped in a cosy, reassuring hug. Those silent hugs, so tight that makes you forget everything around you.

During those six years, I dated several men. Some just for the fun of dating, others to fulfil a (sexual) attraction, and…


Learn how to voice your sexual desires and curiosities

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Talking about sex is beneficial. I don’t mean introducing the topic in random conversations, that’s just weird and rude. But talking about sex with someone significant offers you several benefits.

, I offered an insight into the advantages of talking about sex with your friends.

Today, I will write about the benefits of talking about sex with your partner: the importance of finding your sexual voice and make it heard.

What is a “sexual voice”?

Even for extroverts, talking about sex — your preferences and desires — can be daunting.

Often, this self-censoring is more related to societal, familial or religious repressions than…


Considerations to have when buying lingerie she will love.

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Wearing sexy, beautiful lingerie is a passion for many women.

Despite loving to wear lingerie for my partner — his reaction makes me feel sexy and empowered — , I love doing it for myself. Actually, I think I enjoy doing it for myself more than for him.

I love lingerie. Some women are crazy about shoes, handbags or makeup. Me? Lingerie and boots.

If I could, I would have drawers and drawers filled with sexy lingerie. Classic, kinky, made of lace, silk, latex; one piece, two, three… You name it, I want it.

I buy many of my lingerie…


My sex life has three participants: me, my partner, and my dog.

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Three years ago, I rescued a sweet, staffie dog. He changed my life for the best, in every aspect. My mental health improved drastically (I was going through a rough patch), and I became physically more active. Overall, I became happier.

I love my dog. But he’s an asshole.

It’s true that I spoil him — I let him sleep in my bed, and on my lap despite his 23 kilos, and his will often beats mine.

He suffered enough in the kennel and probably before that, so I want him to be as happy as possible.

Emma London

Writing on Sex and Relationships . Freelancer Email: | Buy me a coffee:

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